Dumbo, 2019, 1 ½ stars

Casey Junior (2019 version)

By Cameron “Ringmaster” Meier

Casey Junior’s comin’ down the track
because Dumbo’s back,
written by some hack.

Nothin’ ‘bout this remake really fits the bill,
Burton, Keaton, Farrell all amount to nil.

Every time Casey’s little whistle sounds
viewers get nostalgic for his first time ‘round.

This new Disney project is a pile of dreck,
should have been crosschecked,
it’s a real train wreck.

(Toot! Toot!)

 

Copyright 2019 © Cameron Meier

Apologies to the original song from the 1941 Dumbo (the only version we need). Original lyrics: https://disney.fandom.com/wiki/Casey,_Jr._(song).